Dusting it off...for reals.

Hello ye old dusty blog.


Long (looooong) time no talk to.

It is late on a Saturday night. The kids are upstairs, the girls are reading My Little Pony books and the boy is making price tags for his "store" that he says he is opening in the morning to sell off random crap he has found around the house.

I sat here at my desk just listening to their voices upstairs. No one is fighting or crying or for that matter whining. A brief moment in paradise is how I see it.

It is a new year and my goal used to be every year to pick a word. I am NOT doing that one anymore. Don't know why? Just check out what happened in previous years that I picked a word. (example: the year of "chill" as in chill the heck out....yeah, that was the year I was diagnosed with melanoma. I did not "chill" one bit.)

We had a fabulous Relief Society activity (is that what they are calling it these days? I think so but I am not quite sure anymore) anyway...it was on setting goals. Realistic, practical, down to earth goals. It hit me. Pretty hard actually, that it wasn't necessary to focus on one word for the year but to sit myself down and have a good hard look at me and what I want to work on...no deadline of a year. Just improve.

Our speaker, Anthony Sweat (was awesome by the way) said we should write them down. So I have. This dusty old blog is now one of my goals. I want to remember weird every day stuff like girls reading My Little Pony books together and the boy and his little store. I am not promising myself to be a faithful daily writer...he said practical goals. He also said it needed to be reportable. I am pretty sure no one even visits "dusty" anymore other than a couple of family members who say "you don't ever update your blog anymore" but that is all I need. A someone out there that I know will be checking in to see if I am keeping my goal. So family member...you know who you are...there is your job!

I just want to remember what life was like right now. What it was reeeallly like...and so that one day my kids can read this and in the teenage years roll their eyes in disgust that I put mushy stuff or possibly even embarrassing stuff. That when they are parents themselves, they can read it and know that I was in their shoes once. (yes they have all been cursed with the dreaded "mothers curse" so I know they will have fun raising "themselves" one day) That life is to be lived and that these really are the best years, they are oh so hard some days but they are the best. Oh this is getting so sappy and mushy.

One last quote to tie my rambling all in for the night...

Above all else, it is about leaving a mark that I existed: I was here. I was hungry. I was defeated. I was happy. I was sad. I was in love. I was afraid. I was hopeful. I had an idea and I had a good purpose and that’s why I made works of art.
Felix Gonzalez-Torres 

 My three works of art.

***Please note that not all blog posts will be sappy blabbering paragraphs of goo. Who knows tomorrow I could tell you about the time the dinner was burning, the dog was piddling on the floor and there was a kid in tears because they slammed their hand in the door. 'Cause my life is more like that.