The difference between men and women...

My mother-in-law Tina sent this to me and I had a great chuckle!! Hope it gives you a laugh for the day!!

Difference Between Women And Men

1.NAMES
* If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.

* If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.

2.EATING OUT

*When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20 , even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

*When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

3. MONEY

* A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

* A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.

4. BATHROOMS

*A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott.

*The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

5.ARGUMENTS

*A woman has the last word in any argument.

*Anything a man says after that... Is the beginning of a new argument.

6.CATS

*Women love cats.

*Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

7.FUTURE

*A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

*A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

8.SUCCESS

*A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

*A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

9.MARRIAGE

*A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

*A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

10.DRESSING UP

* A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

*A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

11.NATURAL

*Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

*Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

12.OFFSPRING Ah, children.

* A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

* A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.